The emotional rollercoaster ride of entrepreneurship
Life is like a rollercoaster; it has its ups and downs. But it's your choice to scream or enjoy the ride.
Well I can tell you all, that I've been screaming quite a lot the past month! Okay maybe not literally screaming, but gosh, I would describe the past month as one crazy rollercoaster ride. To make it more clear to you, and especially for those who are reading this now while procrastinating during theirs bosses' time, I will share a small glimpse of the phases (and feelings) you might experience while setting up your own business. If you were wondering: yes, it is possible to experience all these feelings in one day!
1. The "yes-I'm-super-excited-for-his" feeling: you know that feeling when you see a rollercoaster while scrolling trough your favorite amusement park? You feel like 'let's do this, I am brave enough and let's enjoy the ride!' Luckily this feeling is familiar to me, there are these moment I couldn't be more excited for my company, the #girlboss life and the path I've chosen.
2. While being stuck in the que, the "is-it-an-option-to-go-back?" phase: while being stuck in the que, you slowly get close to the rollercoaster, that now appears to be way higher than before. The queuing makes you annoyed, because you want to be at the top right now, the other people in the queu annoy you, you get afraid and suddenly you see safer options. You start questioning yourself why you wanted to ride the rollercoaster instead of that cute ferris wheel (for those who don't understand, with this I mean a paid job).
3. While buckling up, the "WHY-DID-I-EVEN-WANT-THIS" feeling: you feel nauseous (this happend to me actually in the beginning of may; for no reason I was nauseous for a complete week), your stress levels start rising, and you feel like you can't do this. All entrepreneurs out here will recognize this feeling. But it's up to you how you deal with this. The more you experience this, the better you can prepare yourself for the next time.
4. During take-off, the "Oh-gosh-I'm-really-doing-this" feeling: you know that you have to let go of the fear, and just let go. You don't know what is coming when, and you don't know if you will survive this ride. And you can't control this. This is something I want to focus more on during the next month. Accepting that I can't control certain factors during the ride, and stop fighting against this fear..
5. While approaching the top, the "I-f*cking-love-this!" feeling: and suddenly it kicks in; you feel great, you even get butterflies in your stomach. In this case you literally feel like you are on top of the world. I experience this when I see other people who are enthusiastic about my ideas; or the other participants of the start-up program who tell me that they have faith in me.
6. And finally, when leaving the ride, the "why-did-I-waste-so much-time-on-being-scared-and-can-I-go-again" feeling: while stepping out the cart, you feel great, you wonder why you were so scared. You wished you enjoyed the ride more, and you even feel like going again. One practical example: yesterday I went to the Goaldiggers session in Amsterdam. This is a networking event dedicated to young, ambitious woman. While my alarm went off at 8.30 am on a Sunday morning, I was questioning myself why I signed up for this. Why I needed to go by myself while I hate mingling with strangers. It turned out to be a super inspiring day and I even signed up for the next edition already!
So I've been riding this rollercoaster called entrepreneurship for one official month now. Sometimes I enjoy it, sometimes I hate it. My goal for this month is to feel more comfortable during this ride. And most importantly: start doing things. It is hard for an uber-perfectionist like myself, to share things (such as a website) with the world. Especially in this digital world, changes and adjustment can be made 24/7. So stay tuned, as these blogs will be posted on my own website this week.. (as you are reading this article on my website you can see the real life proof!).
(Imagination sponsored by the Efteling; the perks of growing up next to the best amusement park of the Netherlands).